My Last Fuck To Give

One mini fuck in a corked bottle to give creates the ultimate gag gift or ice breaker for festivals, raves, & everyday life. 

From the moment you're born, you possess an abundance of fucks to give, spending them recklessly like a child with unlimited funds. You give fucks about friendships, grades, personal style, and the thoughts of others. You invest too many fucks into too many things. However, as you age, your capacity for fucks dwindles to about 10 fucks per month, which forces you to prioritize. You allocate fucks to family and career, but have little left for fleeting trends. A coworker requests help outside your job description? You'll attempt to give a fuck, but your fucks are spread thin this month.

As time goes on, your capacity for fucks dwindles further to just 1-2 fucks per month, making each one incredibly valuable. You focus your fucks on family, hobbies, and work, and that's about it. It's not your fault—your fucks have an expiration date. You may have wished to conserve your fucks from your youth, but it's impossible. Eventually, you face a scarcity of fucks. You receive only one fuck per year and must make it last. As a result, even previously significant matters no longer receive your fucks. Some people exhaust their supply quickly, while others possess a reserve that sustains them into their later years. Regardless, at some point, the well of fucks runs dry, and there's nothing left to give. This is simply the fundamental principle of Fuckonomics.